Buddhism for Everyone with JoAnn Fox

Imagine feeling a burst of joy every time someone else wins. A friend gets a promotion, your sister finds love, a stranger shares good news, and you feel happiness with them. That spark of delight is the heart of sympathetic joy, or mudita, a Buddhist practice that  flips the script on comparison and jeaousy. It turns the happiness of others into a source of our own happiness. It's not magic, but it feels like it.

When sympathetic joy is practiced with the bodhicitta intention to become a Buddha for the benefit of all beings, it becomes "Immeasurable Joy." Immeasurable Joy is a trained capacity, a state of mind you can cultivate until it becomes natural and limitless.

When we learn to genuinely rejoice in others' good fortune, our own heart becomes lighter. Life feels less like a competition and more like a shared celebration.

Science-backed Benefits of Sympathetic Joy:

• Greater life satisfaction and happiness

• Better relationships

• More willingness to help others

• Better health outcomes and lower stress (Smith, 2022)

Ways to practice sympathetic joy:

1. Use meditation: 

• Start with a loved one: Begin by focusing on someone you care about and genuinely rejoicing in their happiness. 

• Expand the feeling: Gradually extend this feeling to others you are neutral toward, and then to those you find difficult. 

2. Change your mindset: Instead of feeling that happiness is scarce, recognize the interconnectedness of all beings and cultivate an appreciation for what you have. 

3. Practice gratitude: Cultivating a sense of gratitude for your own life can help you rejoice in the good fortune of others without feeling like there is less for you. 

Sympathetic joy is one of the Four Immeasurables in Mahayana Buddhism:

• Immeasurable Love

• Immeasurable Compassion

• Immeasurable Joy

• Immeasurable Equanimity

"One day, a Brahmin man asked the Buddha, 'What can I do to be sure that I will be with Brahma after I die?'

The Buddha replied,'As Brahma is the source of Love, to dwell with him you must practice the Brahma-viharas [Four Immeasurables]—love, compassion, joy, and equanimity. (Hahn, 1997)"

References with links:

Smith, Jeremy Adam (March, 2022). What Is Sympathetic Joy and How Can You Feel More of It? Greater Good: The Science of a Meaningful Life. Retrieved from: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/what_is_sympathetic_joy_and_how_can_you_feel_more_of_it

Hahn, Thich Naht (1997). Dharma Talk: The Four Immeasurable Minds. Parallax Press. Retrieved from: https://www.parallax.org/mindfulnessbell/article/dharma-talk-the-four-immeasurable-minds-2/

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We constantly make small choices that shape the reality of our relationships, whether with our partner, children, friends, or colleagues. They determine whether we deepen connection or cause resentment and distance to quietly grow.

Every moment holds a fork in the road: Will I feed love, or will I feed pain?

In this episode, we look the difference between love and attachment.

• Love is the wish that another person be happy.

• Attachment is the wish that they make us happy.

Attachment is the habit of selfishness in relationships that causes pain. The strength of a relationship is directly proportional to how much more love is practiced, rather than attachment.

Buddhist Teacher, JoAnn Fox, also shares a simple mindfulness practice to help us feed love and not pain.

All the happiness there is in this world 

Arises from wishing others to be happy. 

And all the suffering there is in this world 

Arises from wishing oneself to be happy.

Shantideva

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Longtime Buddhist Teacher, JoAnn Fox, explores five powerful Buddhist antidotes to anger and aversion:  

• patience acceptance

• recognizing karma

• remembering impermanence

• seeing other people or challenges as spiritual teachers

• compassion

Learn how to meet challenges with wisdom instead of reaction. Buddha reminds us that peace isn't about avoiding pain; it's about understanding it. 

By practicing a simple yet profound method, W.A.I.T What Am I Thinking, we begin to free ourselves from the fires of aversion and cultivate genuine calm instead. In this way, we can transform difficult people and situations into profound opportunities for spiritual growth.

"Because I am patient and do no wrong to those who harm me, I have become a refuge to many." - Buddha

References and Links

Buddha (1986).The Dhammapada: Verses and Stories, Verse 399. Translated by Daw Mya Tin, M.A. (Website). Edited by Editorial Committee, Burma Tipitaka Association Rangoon. Courtesy .of Nibbana.com. For free distribution only, as a gift of dhamma. Retrieved from https://www.tipitaka.net/tipitaka/dhp/verseload.php?verse=399

Find us at the links below: 

Our Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/BuddhismForEveryone

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Instagram: @buddhism4everyone

X: @Joannfox77

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To learn more about virtual classes with JoAnn Fox: Buddhist Study Program

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Delusions are distorted ways of looking at things that make our mind unpeaceful and uncontrolled. Anger exaggerates someone's faults. Attachment exaggerates someone's good qualities. Both lead us away from reality and keep us trapped in craving or aversion.

Buddha taught that what fuels delusions is inappropriate attention. When we dwell on thoughts that feed our delusions, we are engaging in "inappropriate attention."

The way all delusions arise:

Object + inappropriate attention = Delusion

With anger, inappropriate attention might look like replaying an insult, focusing only on someone's faults, or exaggerating how much they've harmed us. Each time we dwell on these thoughts, our anger grows stronger.

Appropriate attention brings peace. We might notice the impermanence of the situation, remember the person's good qualities, or recognize that anger hurts us more than it hurts anyone else. This kind of attention dissolves anger's grip.

The same process that fuels anger also feeds jealousy and attachment. When we compare ourselves to others or fixate on what we lack, jealousy arises. When we focus on only the pleasurable or ideal aspects of someone or something, attachment takes root. Both are forms of clinging to illusions.

We can train our minds to shift this attention. When you notice your train of thought is leading to the darkside--inappropriate attention-- you can say to yourself:

"W.A.I.T. What am I thinking?"

Are these thoughts leading me to peace or away from peace? How can I redirect my thoughts? This simple shift of attention offers profound freedom. By learning to direct our attention wisely, we begin to choose peace over pain, compassion over comparison, and clarity over illusion.

All experience is preceded by mind, 

Led by mind, 

Made by mind. 

Speak or act with a corrupted mind, 

And suffering follows 

As the wagon wheel follows the hoof of the ox. 

 

All experience is preceded by mind, 

Led by mind, 

Made by mind. 

Speak or act with a peaceful mind,

And happiness follows 

Like a never-departing shadow. 

--Buddha, The Dhammapada, Verse 1 - 2

References and Links

Buddha.The Dhammapada. Translated by Gil Fronsdale. (Kindle). Shambala, Boston and London, 2011.

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To learn more about virtual classes with JoAnn Fox: Buddhist Study Program

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In this episode, JoAnn Fox shares the practice of W.A.I.T.—What Am I Thinking? to help us cultivate self-compassion and retrain the often-critical voice in our minds. Through mindfulness, we can begin to notice the thoughts that shape how we treat ourselves, and choose a kinder, more beneficial way to respond.

The Buddha said: 

All experience is preceded by mind, 

Led by mind, 

Made by mind. 

Our world is created by our thoughts. Every word, every action, every mood begins as a whisper in the mind. And sometimes, those whispers aren't so kind.

When we notice the narrator in our head becoming unkind, we can pause and think, 'WAIT! What am I thinking?' Then we try to speak to ourselves with compassion instead of judgment. 

Observe any specific automatic patterns of self-criticism, doubt, or fear. Gradually try to replace them with thoughts rooted in compassion, understanding, and encouragement. For a more on the practice of W.A.I.T for developing self-compassion, see our blog post Awakening Self-Compassion. 

The Five Gates of Speech

The Buddha, in his gentle wisdom, offered a path to mindful speech through what he called "The Five Gatekeepers of Speech." These gatekeepers stand like sentinels, reminding us to pause and make sure our words can pass through these five gates:

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it beneficial? Is it necessary? Is it the right time?

References and Links

Buddha.The Dhammapada. Translated by Gil Fronsdale. (Kindle). Shambala, Boston and London, 2011.

Neff, Kristin. (n.d.). What is self-compassion? Self-Compassion.org. Retrieved https://self-compassion.org/what-is-self-compassion

Find us at the links below: 

Our Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/BuddhismForEveryone

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Buddhismforeveryone

Private Facebook Group:: https://www.facebook.com/groups/sanghatalk/

Website: Buddhismforeveryone.com

Instagram: @buddhism4everyone

X: @Joannfox77

TikTok: @buddhism4everyone

YouTube: @Buddhism4Everyone

To learn more about virtual classes with JoAnn Fox: Buddhist Study Program

To learn about Life Coaching with JoAnn Fox visit www.BuddhismforEveryone.com/coaching